Montgomery, Alabama
While at Tyndall we met a lovely Captain Anderson. She was our sponsor (that's military for, let me show you the ropes when you get here) and she immediately fell in love with our perfect children. It's funny that the first time we had lunch with her, she looked at Chloe, who was 4, and said, "So, what have you done today?" Chloe, very seriously, said, "I got a lot of spankin's today because I won't listen to Mommy, but she's not mad. She just spanked me and I stopped but then I did it again and she spanked me again. Sometimes I don't listen." Then she grinned. Kristina thought it was hilarious. I was shocked that Chloe just stated it so matter-of-factly. I don't know where she gets that. I was also a little nervous that Kristina would disapprove and call the authorities. People do that sometimes, but she said, "Yeah, sometimes we just need spankin's." She left Tyndall that year to go to Montgomery, AL, but we kept in touch because she's just fabulous.
I had home schooled Caylea for first grade in Texas and let her go to 2nd grade at Tyndall AFB's school. By the end of 2nd grade we knew that we needed to keep our kids home for a while. There are many reasons:
#1 Continuity of Education..if you move around frequently, your kids get varying levels of the subjects, making it difficult to adequately monitor their progress.
#2 God tells us to train our children in the way they should go and to talk with them all of the time. You can't do that if your child is gone 9 out of the 12 waking hours of the day.
#3 We were really tired of the social skills Caylea was picking up at school. Don't ever ask me the question "what about socialization.' You'll get more than you bargained for.
Kristina was kind enough to let us move in with her at her 3-bedroom, 2 bath home. I cooked and cleaned for her while we were looking for a house. We found one a moved in on January 20th. The kids loved it, especially Caylea, because it had a huge upstairs room over the garage that was hers/homeschool/guest room. She thought she loved it. It took a year to get her to sleep up there without having trouble, but she finally overcame herself and was fine.
We kept homeschooling, getting involved with a great group of people. I met some very dear friends, and my kids made what I think will be life-long friends for them. These kids are so awesome. Since we've left, they've sent more cards, letters, knick-knacks, etc than I can count, and I love them (and their mom).
Caylea started gymnastics while in Florida and it quickly became apparent that she was quite talented. When we moved to Alabama we put her in the best gym in the area, even though it was a 45 minute drive one way. She did really well, placing 1st in State, and continued doing really well until she severely sprained her ankle on her birthday in 2007. The injury cost her 2 months of training and affected her mental capacity to deal with difficulties. She's never been aggressive anyway, and I honestly think that she needed to be done. We let her continue, though, and planned to let her continue even in Germany, but when we went to Florida for the 2 months before coming to Germany, she kept complaining about her ankles, wrists, back, etc. We talked to her very seriously about God's plans for her versus her plans. God has gifted her musically beyond anything I've seen in the children I've met. She's no Mozart or anything, but she writes beautiful songs and is quite talented by ear. I told her that God has other plans for her, and that gymnastics was only a fun thing anyway, that MIGHT pay for college, but that we'd much rather her go for something using her mind. Once she prayed about it and decided to quit, she hasn't looked back. That, she gets from me. Once I make up my mind, you'll find it quite challenging to sway me.
Chloe, on the other hand, has tried various activities. She did cheerleading, gymnastics, ballet, praise dance, soccer, and golf. She loves golf, but breaks out in a rash every time she goes. The child has allergies that come out in the form of sneezes and eczema. One day soon God will heal her and we'll throw a huge party. She wants to try softball. She is most like me in build and temperament, though. She is awkward and clumsy which, like I said, is like me, so I'm not being mean. I can trip on a bare floor and so can Chloe. It's a gift. It makes people laugh. When I turned 14 I started running hurdles in track, which amazed my parents. I keep telling Chloe, "One day you'll grow into your body and do something amazing. Right now just try to keep from getting hurt." My parents actually forbid me to run when I was younger. You should see Chloe ride a bike. It is hilarious. She wobbles side to side like crazy, but never falls. She's perfectly comfortable riding that way, thank you very much.
Joshua tried TaeKwonDo when he turned 6. Josh is my loner kid. He doesn't really care if there is someone to play with as long as he has Legos, etc. Chloe never meets a stranger. Caylea is actually what I would call "shy." It takes her a long time to warm up. Joshua doesn't take time to warm up, but you can tell that he can take or leave a friendship. He's very content to do his own thing. Chloe loves having people around. Caylea loves having 1 good friend around. Yes, they have the same parents. Nature loves genetic diversity, and you don't get much more diverse than my Amer/Asian/Indian kids. Joshua really liked TKD and actually started interacting more once he got involved. He still doesn't like sparring. He loves to play fight and wrestle his Dad and mine, but really sparring at TKD isn't his gig. He doesn't have a mean bone in his body, and neither does Caylea. I always say that if Caylea had Chloe's personality, she would be an Olympic Gymnast by now, or that if Chloe had Caylea's personality, she truly would be the left-out middle child. As it is, Caylea gets to do her own thing, and Chloe absolutely demands attention when she needs it. I'm glad for that. She'll say, "mommy, can you cuddle with me and scratch my back?" I do, and she's fine. I don't buy into that whole "left out" thing anyway. Each child has such a unique personality that you have to figure out what works best individually.
I do have to say that, no matter which kid, there WILL be spankings. There isn't a personality in the world that doesn't benefit from the discipline that God calls us to use repeatedly in His Word. (I've read the Bible through many times now, and I've never once seen "time-out" used in any way, shape, or form. Correct me if I'm wrong. Also, God doesn't count to 3.) No matter how quiet or "willful," you can train your children to be pleasant to be around, and mine definitely are. To their credit, though...they could CHOOSE not to obey. I tell my children all of the time, "I can teach you all day long, but if you decide that you're going to do certain things, I won't be able to stop you when you get older. You have to choose what kind of person you're going to be. I don't mean WHAT you're going to be like a doctor or vet., or nurse...I mean WHO you're going to be. Are you going to be a selfish person or a giving person? Are you going to be Godly or un-Godly? That, ultimately, is YOUR choice. I can force you to live by my rules while you are here, but there is coming a day when you have to decide for yourself. It's better to decide now and live that way than try to change once you get older. You have to choose to be a person of Godly character or not. It's really up to you." that speech seems to work really well on my 3.
Well, now I've caught us up to present time. We're in Germany, having a blast. The kids took a bike ride to the park and brought the walkie-talkies with them. Caylea occasionally calls and says, "Calling our Mommy...." She always ends with "over and out," and I say "Roger dodger." Simple things amuse us, and that's okay. It's much better to be easily amused than easily angered (Be slow to speak, slow to anger and quick to listen...Proverbs...I guess you can tell that's my favorite book in the Old Testament.)
Some people have said that I must have a lot of time on my hands to write all of this. I think it's more that I feel like I need to write this stuff down for some reason. I type phenomenally fast anyway (remember the 120 words per minute record I set?) Most people don't talk as fast as I type. I'm not bragging. It's just a fact, kind of like the fact that I have brown hair with rapidly growing streaks of white. So, my kids give me an hour and I type. It's very "belaxing," as Josh would say. :)
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